In making decisions for someone, how can I give them the right amount of autonomy?

Families often want to provide protection and support for aging loved ones. But it’s also important to respect those individuals’ right to live with risk. 

Consider preparing planning documents that are narrower in scope. For example, a power of attorney doesn’t have to cover every financial or legal decision — it can be drafted to only deal with specific issues. Another approach could be a springing power of attorney.

Also, bringing in some home-based care can smooth an aging parent’s transition to a life of less independence. It can help them realize that they’re becoming increasingly unable to make decisions on their own. 

You can take your aging parents to certain appointments (like with a lawyer). But you might consider leaving the room when they confirm important instructions to avoid the possibility of undue influence.

Ongoing conversation is key. Recognize that the need to give up your autonomy is a difficult decision. Talk to your aging parent about the advantages of planning documents, like putting them in a position to make informed choices, easing the burden on family members, and avoiding the cost and time of a court potentially having to get involved. If these conversations aren’t working, perhaps they’d listen to a lawyer — invite them to check out these archived webinars on planning, where BC legal professionals explain the ins and outs of planning documents.